So….crazy bit of news. I’m pregnant. Yes. Again. The one month where Kevin and I weren’t even trying after dealing with last month’s chemical pregnancy. I’m still in shock. Let me back up a bit. On Thursday, December 7th, we had a foster care webinar for two hours. I had taken a pregnancy test, as… Continue reading What the What?!?!
If you would have told me, two and a half years ago, when I first started this journey, that this is where I would be, I don’t know what I would say. I’m certain I would not have to words for it, just as I don’t quite have the words for it even now. Three… Continue reading Where Does The Road End?
When in the midst of crying, it seems like the amount of tears is finite for a reason. Eventually you will hit the end and that means you’ve gone as far into the depth of pain as your body will allow. But over the last two days, and really the last 11 months, I have… Continue reading When There’s Not Enough Tears
After a long field trip day and lots of bleeding, I came home to test just to see if there was any chance. The lines got a lot lighter as you can see above. The top was from this morning and the bottom from tonight. I’m going to save myself the trauma of more blood… Continue reading 3
So a new update…everything has happened so quick. I tested on a whim yesterday and got a positive! My first definitive natural positive. Of course, immediately after that happened I started bleeding. First brown and then bright red. My heart sunk because I’ve had bleeding in both miscarriages. Both have signaled the beginning of the… Continue reading Prayers Please
Dearest Lorelai, I know it is presumptuous perhaps to assume that you would have been a girl, but based on what I know about you, it only makes sense. Us Poljanac gals are pretty easy to spot. You were 1 of the original 10 embryos to make it to freeze, the top rated one. You… Continue reading A Letter to You on What Should Have Been Your Birth day
As I have noted in previous entries, I have a weird relationship with my birthday. As in I still act like a little kid on the day. I don’t know why, but it is a day that makes me feel special and just present, here. Today has felt different. I woke up to a beautiful… Continue reading My Birthday